On Why You Should
Believe You Are Sexy
Why? Because you’re
fucking sexy. Period.
Let me break it down from the perspective of a woman who
just recently accepted that she is in fact sexy.
The bottom line is that there are so many images and ideas
in our culture dictating what is sexy that us mere mortals hardly ever feel
truly sexy. Think of the sexiest person,
image, or scenario you can imagine.
Having recently watched ‘Taking Lives’, mine involves Angelina
Jolie. For you it may be something
different, but I’m writing this article, not you, so we’re sticking with
Angelina, got it?!
Not to ruin the movie or anything, but at one point, she
opens her hotel room in a loose, thin robe and the look on her face just
screams “I want the D!” Watching that,
my first thought was “I could never be that sexy.” First, I do not look like Angelina
Jolie. Secondly, I have always
considered myself far too self-conscious and reserved to even suggest with a
look that I want the D.
But then there’s the issue of my latest paramour, who has
told me repeatedly that I’m in fact dripping with sexuality. What?
Me? Naw. I’m funny, smart, cute, sometimes spirited,
but not sexy.
Except I am. All
those attributes I just described and many more make me one sexy beast. I don’t need to be in any particular clothing
or look like any particular model of beauty to be sexy. So how did I accept this and begin to believe
it?
One of my favorite axioms is “Fake it till you make
it.” If you aren’t accustomed to being
‘sexy’, pretending to be sexy will get you at least half way there. Let me give an example. I have a friend who I think is incredibly
sexy. She’s sensual and doesn’t even
seem to try. A few months ago we were
getting to know a couple gentlemen on a double-date of sorts (if you consider
going home with a couple cute guys from a bar a date).
When asked what music we wanted to hear, we of course
shouted out “PITBULL” in unison because if I’m drinking, nothing brings out my
inner slut faster than hearing that man sing “Yo no quiero agua, yo quiero
bebida, Mami tu eres loca no te hagas la fina”.
My friend starts to dance and I’m thinking, “Great, she’s sooo sexy,
these guys are going to forget I exist.”
I want to take a moment to point out jealousy over who’s
garnering more male attention is a fatal flaw in our collective society as
women and we need to work to destroy it every time we encounter it. Moving on.
Before I let myself be consumed by oddly jealous thoughts of
someone I love as much as my friend, I decided to try pretending to be
sexy. I thought, these guys don’t know I
scrapped my knee the week before in a swimming pool (yeah, I’m that clumsy).
So I rose in all my fake sexy glory, closed my eyes, and
started to groove. And I kept on
groovin’, till the guy I wanted to groove with couldn’t help himself and
grooved with me. And we grooved baby, oh
boy did we groove.
At one point, he pulled me close and whispered, “Oh damn,
you’re sexy”. That was nice, and the
intended result, but I was already feeling it before he said it.
And that’s the point of faking it till you make it. Others will see you as sexy if you feel it
for yourself first. You will attract
people to you with the confidence sexy people have. The fun of being sexy is that you don’t have
to work that hard, and for the moments when you’re just going with what feels
good and pleasurable, you can relax and enjoy your body (and hopefully other
bodies) in a way that doesn’t require too much thinking. ¡Qué lindo!
Internet points to whoever adds up how many times I used the
words ‘sexy’ and ‘groove’!
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