Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Titillating Tuesdays #2

On Why You Should Believe You Are Sexy

Why?  Because you’re fucking sexy.  Period.

Let me break it down from the perspective of a woman who just recently accepted that she is in fact sexy.
The bottom line is that there are so many images and ideas in our culture dictating what is sexy that us mere mortals hardly ever feel truly sexy.  Think of the sexiest person, image, or scenario you can imagine.  Having recently watched ‘Taking Lives’, mine involves Angelina Jolie.  For you it may be something different, but I’m writing this article, not you, so we’re sticking with Angelina, got it?!

Not to ruin the movie or anything, but at one point, she opens her hotel room in a loose, thin robe and the look on her face just screams “I want the D!”  Watching that, my first thought was “I could never be that sexy.”  First, I do not look like Angelina Jolie.  Secondly, I have always considered myself far too self-conscious and reserved to even suggest with a look that I want the D.

But then there’s the issue of my latest paramour, who has told me repeatedly that I’m in fact dripping with sexuality.  What?  Me?  Naw.  I’m funny, smart, cute, sometimes spirited, but not sexy.

Except I am.  All those attributes I just described and many more make me one sexy beast.  I don’t need to be in any particular clothing or look like any particular model of beauty to be sexy.  So how did I accept this and begin to believe it?

One of my favorite axioms is “Fake it till you make it.”  If you aren’t accustomed to being ‘sexy’, pretending to be sexy will get you at least half way there.  Let me give an example.  I have a friend who I think is incredibly sexy.  She’s sensual and doesn’t even seem to try.  A few months ago we were getting to know a couple gentlemen on a double-date of sorts (if you consider going home with a couple cute guys from a bar a date). 

When asked what music we wanted to hear, we of course shouted out “PITBULL” in unison because if I’m drinking, nothing brings out my inner slut faster than hearing that man sing “Yo no quiero agua, yo quiero bebida, Mami tu eres loca no te hagas la fina”.  My friend starts to dance and I’m thinking, “Great, she’s sooo sexy, these guys are going to forget I exist.” 



I want to take a moment to point out jealousy over who’s garnering more male attention is a fatal flaw in our collective society as women and we need to work to destroy it every time we encounter it.  Moving on.
Before I let myself be consumed by oddly jealous thoughts of someone I love as much as my friend, I decided to try pretending to be sexy.  I thought, these guys don’t know I scrapped my knee the week before in a swimming pool (yeah, I’m that clumsy).

So I rose in all my fake sexy glory, closed my eyes, and started to groove.  And I kept on groovin’, till the guy I wanted to groove with couldn’t help himself and grooved with me.  And we grooved baby, oh boy did we groove. 

At one point, he pulled me close and whispered, “Oh damn, you’re sexy”.  That was nice, and the intended result, but I was already feeling it before he said it. 

And that’s the point of faking it till you make it.  Others will see you as sexy if you feel it for yourself first.  You will attract people to you with the confidence sexy people have.  The fun of being sexy is that you don’t have to work that hard, and for the moments when you’re just going with what feels good and pleasurable, you can relax and enjoy your body (and hopefully other bodies) in a way that doesn’t require too much thinking.  ¡Qué lindo!


Internet points to whoever adds up how many times I used the words ‘sexy’ and ‘groove’!


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